Writing an Outstanding Intro Message
I really hate sales pitches that start with “I have the perfect formula to make you…” rich, smart, cool, less smelly… Highly suspect, sales pitch. You don’t know how smelly I am…
But, guys, I have the perfect formula for you to write a knock-out first message.
Ready?
Can you stand the excitement?
Here it is:
Comment on something from their profile that resonated with you.
Explain why it resonated.
Ask a follow-up question.
That’s it. That’s the whole ball game.
Here are a few examples:
Hi Sadie,
I was so excited to see that you have read every single Stephen King book! I’ve been obsessed with him since I was 15 years old and stayed up past my bedtime with a flashlight to finish It, and then I stayed up even later because I couldn’t sleep. Do you have a favorite? Or if not, one that you think about especially often?
Hey, Jo! Nice to bump into a fellow aerialist! I’ve been taking classes for a year now and wow, my abs may never forgive me. How long have you been at it?
Wow, Stephanie, I got so excited when I saw your photo from Iceland! I spent a semester there between college and grad school and I haven’t been back since. Is the fermented shark as good as I remember?
Here’s the beauty of this formula:
You are clearly showing that you read her profile and you aren’t just swiping right on everyone you see. You cared enough to notice something about her, and you have a genuine interest in who she is as a person – you’re excited that you have something in common!
You’ve opened the door for further conversation using something other than the hideously dull “So, where did you grow up?” or “What do you like to do for fun?” or (god help us all) “How’s your Monday going?”
At an even more basic level, you’re setting yourself apart from 95% of guys who either lead with an incredibly compelling “hey” or an exhaustingly objectifying and equally compelling “hey, beautiful.”
You’re also saving yourself from the trap of writing a five-paragraph essay with topic sentences and a pithy conclusion. Those, while much more rare, can be just as off-putting to the very nice stranger who you’ve just asked to dedicate several minutes of her valuable time to getting to the end of your missive.
Short. Sweet. Engaged and engaging. That’s THE SECRET, my friends. Happy messaging!